ATHOL — Eleven years ago at the age of 14, Jenna Sujdak had to gather the strength to tell her mother that her stepfather, who was like a second father to her, was sexually abusing her. They were living in Connecticut at the time and mother and daughter moved back to this area to start a legal process against him, when he committed suicide.
Her mother, Heather Sujdak, took her to Disney World to remind her “that there was still joy and good things in the world.” Jenna ended up becoming a cast member at the resort, then later returned to Massachusetts where she worked for a rape crisis hotline in Worcester. She received a degree in psychology from Framingham State College through which she did an internship at Pathways for Change, an agency which provides services to those who have been impacted by sexual violence. She currently works for the Department of Developmental Services in Templeton.
Sujdak has been very open about her own experience, with postings on her Facebook page and on an Instagram site that focuses on sexual abuse awareness.
She said victims of sexual abuse often feel guilty and find it difficult to come forward. “When someone finally gets the courage, they’re confronted with the question of ‘why did you wait so long?’ and the survivor decides not to pursue things further,” she said. She has done “a lot” of personal healing on her own, and when she realized there weren’t any support groups in the immediate area, she decided to start one for adult female survivors of sexual abuse.
Finding Hope/Athol meets the first and third Tuesdays of each month at 6 p.m. in the Athol Congregational Church, 1225 Chestnut St. The group is not faith-based and is co-led by Lauren Babinea. Sujdak’s mother is a sales representative for the Younique Foundation, which is committed to inspiring hope and healing in women who have been sexually abused as children or adolescents. The Foundation, based in Utah, hosts a free retreat for female survivors of childhood sexual abuse. It provided the materials to start the Athol group.
April is Sexual Assault Awareness and Prevention Month. According to Sujdak, one in four women and one in six men will be sexually assaulted before age 18. “It’s definitely a more visible issue than it has been,” she said, and it’s different for every person. If a loved one wants to provide support to the survivor and needs guidance, Sujdak said calling a rape crisis hotline can help.
Sujdak was “unable to say the words” of what she was going through at the time. “As a father, he’s supposed to love you and protect you. It feels weird, a whole conflicted mess,” she recalled. What drove her to tell her mother, who worked nights when the abuse was happening, was that “he had escalated things to a new level and it made me sick to my stomach.”
As the saying goes, if it doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. Sujdak doesn’t remember when the sexual assaults started, but she found a diary entry six months before reporting to her mother that said he was “grooming,” which meant “he was trying to make things that were happening normal and innocent” like having her sit on his lap and give her kisses that continued into her teenage years, “long after most kids stop that behavior.” The diary entry revealed how a particular incident made her feel uncomfortable.
As time went on, the trauma became easier for her to deal with. “At some point you figure out your triggers and more about being mindful about different things that can affect you. There are strategies that can help you live a better life, even with triggers.”
Sujdak said she hopes sharing her story and Finding Hope inspires people to come forward. Her mother is “super proud” and supportive. She said, “I feel blessed and honored to have her in my life.”
For more information call 774-286-0561, or write to soprano193@yahoo.com.